Don’t you wonder sometimes about sound and vision?
About people and places and things that inspire you? About moments that you half-comprehend and are unsure if you understand, about those moments?
About times when you could have gone one or even two of a multitude of ways – but you could only see the diverging choices in retrospect?
About ifs? About happiness and sadness and differences and friendships?
[sound] last weekend some of my friends and I held a Zaireeka party in a restored house in a village in France. It was better than I expected from a concept that Wayne Coyne had named from a word collision between ‘Zaire’ and ‘Eureka’. I think beforehand I had kind of misunderstood the concept of the four cds playing simultaneously. They have different parts of each song on them and, seemingly deliberately, phase in and out of sync with one another. Stamping and shape-making around the room we became infused with the chaos of the music surrounding us.
[people, places, things, moments] We drove to France. At the ferry terminal at this end we pulled up just as the early (all things are relative) moved off out of the dock. Spotting a sign that might sell us wine, beer or coffee we got out of the car. One of us made a huge leap in the air, her fists and legs went in any direction. It was an expression of joy. I’ve never seen her jump that high before.
[diverging choices, ifs] I was introduced to this video while we were in France. One of the lyrics got stuck in my mind, as well as a screenshot of the man looking gutted.
[happiness, sadness, differences, friendships] How many words do you know? Some of my friends know every two letter word that is permissible in scrabble. This never happened when we played it as kids. To me it’s a bit vulgar to use words whose meaning you don’t know, but after a while I did it as well. I used words that I couldn’t put in a sentence. Other times I used words I knew were definitely in the language and I was disbelieved. Our vocabulary telescoping to internet, not book, literacy. I want to start a book-scrabble club. We’d read the same book and then play scrabble only using words that had occurred in that book, and discuss the book while we play.
It’s 2012! Everyone party! Oh – we did that already? Now we have to go to work? This is going to be a year full of lots of exciting adventures, escapades and hard hard work of hardness? Oh. Okay…
There’s enough of the mutter mutter ah aha ye… yeh! reflect reflect think about the past and remark on my progress in pretty much all of my journal writing from 2011 that I think that, you know, it surfeits. The appetite for it if not dead is sickening and so this here new year blog post will be all hello future what do you hold instead. I have a few sentences in my head about the last year, what I’ve learned and all that so I’m sure I’ll write about it again at some point, but hopefully not.
There is so much potential in this new year. Although its unseasonable warmth is currently making me a bit nervous. But then I think: surely the world doesn’t end in a misplaced autumn? Surely not. So then I calm down.
My new year’s resolutions for the past two years have been these:
It makes a lot of sense yes?
I write this from the incredible space of my friend and fellow writer Sara Caba‘s amazing flat. Sara and her husband have been travelling around Vietnam and Cambodia for the end/beginning of 2011/2012 and let me stay in their really quite indescribably lovely home for a few weeks. It’s been… medicinal is the word I keep typing and deleting. I mean it’s been like being at a meditation retreat, or how I would imagine that to be. I’ve eaten a lot of brown rice, wholemeal noodles, organic live yoghurt. I’ve typed and written. I’ve stayed out late with my friends. Maybe there’ll be more of this kind of behaviour in 2012. I hope so.